considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
