Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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