this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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