It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
