i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
