Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
