What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize