Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
