I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
