its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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