I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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