So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
