Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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