I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize