I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
