Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
