Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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