took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize