Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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