At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
