Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
