I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
