it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
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