i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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