Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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