i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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