and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
