So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize