yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
