shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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