Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
