i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
