idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
