i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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