Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
