Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
