She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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