Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize