She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
