are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
