What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
