Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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