Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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