So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
