HIV tests are more positive than that guy
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
