Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
