you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
