So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
