Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize