I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
