the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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